Finding an escape in graduate school
2020 has been a pretty big year for everyone. And there’s been a lot of chaos, hurt, pain, and so many other adjectives that would be so hard to list all at once.
But at the same time, 2020 has been a year of getting close to people we love (or hate), having more time on our hands to delve into hobbies, and time to reflect on where we are in life. And really ask ourselves, “am I happy where I am right now?”
For me, that was a huge no.
I mean, don’t get me wrong, post-college undergrad life was pretty good.
I had a job, a set schedule, and I didn’t have to worry about grades, deadlines, or anxiety around opening up my student email.
However, at the same time, the 9–5 life was pretty stressful to me.
I didn’t love the lack of feedback from my boss and my perfectionism literally ate me alive every morning as I waited in my car until 8:45 AM and then clocked into work (because I got in trouble for coming into work too early…).
It was really difficult falling in love with the 9–5 life and perhaps it was the field I chose. Vision therapy.
But I, for the most part, loved what I did and my co-workers. I just hated how much my perfectionism was killing me and the uncertainty that came with my performance at work.
I also REALLY longed to go back to college. So what did I do? I applied to graduate school.
Now… I applied to graduate school BEFORE the pandemic hit.
I had NO IDEA a pandemic would hit. I mean no one did…
But once I got my acceptance letter I was THRILLED. I could finally escape the 9–5 life and go back to the place I loved…. school.
And of course, I knew graduate school wouldn’t be a walk in the park, but at least it would give me the structure I had been used to since I was 5-years-old.
However, I also need to figure out how to be OK with returning to the 9–5 life once I get done with my Master’s Degree. That will be really difficult, I’m sure. But hopefully once I return to working full-time, I’ll be less impulsive, more mature, and more ready for the 9–5 grind.
But for now, I feel so fortune to be in school in a time of a lot of uncertainty. I also feel so fortunate to further my education in a field that’s fascinating: statistics. While at the same time building up my own blog and seeing where that takes me!
Blogging has been such an escape from graduate school.
I love how I can be creative (in blogging) and logical (doing statistics in school). It’s the perfect combo for me and I’m very interested to see where I end up by 2022.
By really what I am getting at is: It’s ok if you are not ready to take on the 9–5 life. You can always pivot and go back to school if that’s really something you want to do. And if no, start looking for a new job. Something that makes you feel fulfilled. And it’s ok, if it takes you multiple tries to get it right.
